After leaving the hospital John stopped at Barnes and Noble to get a coffee for the 2 + hour drive home. I made the mistake of going in. I was on my feet no more than fifteen minutes .... but after literally laying down except to go to the bathroom across the hall for over a week, and not being on my feet for close to five weeks, fifteen minutes seemed like running a marathon. I (hopefully) still have weeks of bedrest and the consequential atrophy ahead of me. I barely had the strength to get back to car! Heaven help me for the recovery of this pregnancy!
But really, I was struck with sensory overload. Being in public after 46 days of bedrest was a challenge. It was pandemonium. There were cars everywhere - everywhere! People were driving so fast and so aggressively! And lights! Flashing lights, bright lights, colored lights, lights to come and lights to go, lights to show you when and where and how! And people! Thousands of people rushing all over the store. Bouncing like popcorn. Out of elevators, down escalators, criss-crossing and whizzing past each other, invading my personal space. Endless amounts of brightly colored books stacked from the floor to above my head in tightly packed aisles. Toys and games of all different shapes and sizes. Marketing images assailed me from all directions - glaring, sharp, suffocating. Christmas music, snippets from a hundred different conversations, negotiating parents, crying children all reached my ears simultaneously. The store seemed like a giant machine without any purpose or rhythm. All the parts were grinding and clunking, but the parts weren't working together. It was counter productive.
I didn't have a panic attack. But I calmly observed a total confusion that didn't make sense to me. It was interesting to see the chaotic American Christmas shoppers from this light. I hope they aren't missing the beauty of the celebration to come. Friends, I hope you all take a moment to quiet your souls.
Sounds like a Dr. Suess scene :)
ReplyDeleteI am so glad to hear the good news! Time keeps moving forward (at a constant rate, interestingly enough), so you just have to wait it out. Easier said than done, I'm sure.
I'm so glad you're back home now, and I know it will be reassuring for the kids. Personally, I couldn't agree more with your take on Christmas shopping, but I know you'll feel better when you can simply look out of the window and see the orchard and perhaps stick your head out and hear the quiet of the snow falling. Let the peace soak in! And can you do some form of isometrics for muscle building without actual exercise?
ReplyDeleteHurray! We're so excited for you (and John and the kids)!
ReplyDeleteIf you think you had sensory overload, just think how Darren's going to feel! (Yes, I am praying with full confidence!!)
ReplyDeleteI guess it could have only been more accurate if you'd been floating around in a nice warm pool for all those weeks.
Plus Barnes and Noble can be a bustling chaos this time of year.
I too have sensory overload at this time of year, and have given up on the celebration of shopping. I'm sorry, but if people absolutely need something, they'll figure out a way to get it. So that means whatever you give them, they don't really need... The holiday has morphed into a shop-athon...where if you don't have a present for someone when the music stops, you're a schmuck! Who was born on December 25th? Oh, that's right! It wasn't Jesus, as he was born in the Spring...using a different calendar... It must be Santa's birthday! Or maybe it was the birth of the Holiday Store Sales Rating System! Happy Festivus!
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